it's done....

done forever. the big summer nerd camp. the six weeks of pure insanity. the.......:
1- very sneakily walking up to children that do not get scolded (because they're the well-behaved nerdballs of their classes) and putting my face three inches away from their face and quietly saying "get. off. the. chain." (the chain on campus these kids would sit on) with a deadpan face, invoking absolute terror.
2- telling 12-year-old hornballs to stop making out on the grass. cus it's 9 a.m. and you're getting more action than i am.
3- yelling "hey, seriously?! does that seem like a good idea?" to the oddball kid who recorded himself farting on a previous occasion but at the time of the screaming incident was throwing large pieces of concrete as hard as he could onto the brick walkway. he stopped with arms raised, holding another large rock, and said "no." right. stop it.
4- wondering whether i am overreacting regarding the ok-ness of the day where girls dress as boys and boys dress as girls... which really turns more into an opportunity for kids to make fun of those individuals who live their lives as transvestites... or at least incorporate it into their lifestyle. i think i'm going to fight this day of "festivities" next year. plus, 12-year-old boys walking around wearing skimpy tank tops and mini-skirts and STILL trying to play frisbee is unacceptable.
5- screaming "GET OFF THE DNA!" to a kid that was walking on a 20-foot DNA chalk drawing my students made. i then asked him to not pee on the drawing. he craned his neck and looked at the back of his legs.... checking, i assume, to make sure he wasn't peeing. he wasn't.
6- convincing students that the highest levels of our atmosphere are held in place by pixies, that orangutans are the original architects of New Wave, and that holding your breath can cause your height to decrease precipitously over time.
7- being treated to students dressing up as Drosophila for presentations. amazing and wonderful and delightful.