how much smoke is too much smoke?

so i volunteered to help out with the drama club this fall. they're putting on "the legend of sleepy hollow" and i am in charge of teaching the kids how to use the light board and other such fun things. including the smoke machine. i got it working yesterday and set it up for rehearsal today. nothing better than blasting the shit out of that machine behind the curtains and then having oodles of students walk back and start coughing and rubbing their eyes and ask "what's going on?" then, of course, they got super excited once they realized what indeed what was going on: miss dr. larson's going to smoke-blast the balls out of your faces. i showed a techie zack how to use the machine, then uttered "it's not enough smoke machine if they're still breathing" in reference to the poor wheezing juvenile actors. i walked away after giving zach the remote for the machine, then heard the sweet whirring of that machine as he blew an insane amount of smoke onto the stage. kids again started coughing and said it was enough smoke, to which i heard zach reply "if they're still breathing it's not enough smoke machine."

absolutely.

another highlight of the day: oh mr. soren managed to make me laugh so hard today i had to take a break, look down, and breathe as slowly as possible while thinking about the least funny thing i could think of. i was giving a lecture on newton's third law and gravity and as i turned from the blackboard i spotted soren, cross-eyed and staring down the bridge of his nose, trying to see if he could see his nostrils moving as he flared them in and out like a raging bull. he's in the front row. directly in front of my desk. and flaring his nostrils like a crosseyed rabid beast.